Well, it's been a while

Well, let’s start from the top I guess. I’m 26, and sometimes I wonder if I have really come that far in my recovery. I don’t know that I have come far or at all. There is some times were there is nothing in my head, or things I can’t control that drive me mad with worry. There is not much that I can do. It is just playing with meds and playing with meds. Going to therapy. My life has fallen into a pattern and I just can’t that I can’t control what they are doing.  I’m not sure if I’m getting better or not because I really have no way to measure if I am or not. But it is what it is I guess.

It is in my head the closer I get to my anniversary date as well. I would like to say those thoughts have completely left me, but I don't want to lie to you all. I can't lie. Some days I wish that I had been successful, and I wish that those days were becoming few and farer between, but the truth is that it is about the same. Hopefully it will get better.

I had an interview this morning and I’m starting a new job come Monday. I really don’t know how my life is going to go now, but I suppose it is a start.

I just feel tired all the time tell the truth. But I will try to be more interesting.

Some things are just what they are.

-Skadi